He was good, then he was gone,
I was 33 years old when my dad sent me a text (yes, a text) telling me that he left my mom. In the text he also asked me and my sister not to contact him. He said he would contact us in a few weeks. Over a year passed without a word – no new phone number, email, or forwarding address. I struggled to navigate the devastation he left behind for me, my sister, and especially my mom, so like any millennial seeking answers, I took to the internet to try to understand how I could best support my mom and how I could deal with my own heartbreak. I found multiple resources online for children under 18 with divorced parents, but very little on adult children whose parents were divorcing for the first time. Even less about how the abrupt end of the marriage could also mean the end of the parent/adult child relationship.
Years later, I’m here, not as an expert, but as a daughter who misses the father she knew before he abandoned his family. I’ve healed in some areas, but have more progress to make in others. I plan to reflect on my experiences here in hopes that others in a similar situation will find support and comfort while navigating the disappointments experienced from a good dad who, by his own choosing, is now gone.